— Um, Barista, there’s something wrong with my coffee.
— Sorry Sir — what’s the matter?
— I ordered a coffee.
— Yes Sir — I gave you a coffee.
— But this doesn’t taste like coffee. You must be mistaken.
— A Grande, black, right? To go?
— That’s what I ordered, yes.
— I just brewed that coffee fresh right before I poured it Sir. It should be fine.
— You mean to tell me you made this today?
— Of course.
— But that’s awful. Coffee should be brewed the day before serving. How many times did you brew it?
— The once….
— Exactly! You didn’t boil it three times! No wonder it tastes like shit!
— Sir, there’s no need for profanity.
— This rubbish is what you’d serve a child, not a grown man. I want my money back.
— Very well. Here’s your tuppence ha’penny. Good luck, to you Sir.
A Plain Cookery Book for the Working Classes, Charles Elmé Francatelli, The Scolar Press, 1852
