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Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Dancing On The Ceiling




Don’t think you can afford a pot racks like professional chefs have in their home kitchens? Well, now you can! Our pot rack, developed from the humble clothing rack, has been finely crafted in the thinnest aluminum, held together by the smallest rivets for minimum strength and security. If you don’t believe me, stand underneath while I load it up with cast iron pans! Attached to your ceiling by an ingenious strip of double sided tape, this pot rack will be a boon to your kitchen for years to come. All you have to do when in the middle of cooking a hot meal is to grab a chair from the dining room and stand on it to reach a ladle or colander. It couldn’t be easier! Order yours today!

Self assembly required. Must be 18 or older to order. Only $19.99 + S+H. Please, No C.O.Ds.

Family Circle Illustrated Library of Cooking Vol 1, 1972

Also from this book: Picnic on Tatooine

Monday, September 24, 2012

American Pastoral




The unopened bag of charcoal.
The two-inch thick steaks.
The lack of smoke or heat distortion coming off the grill.
The asbestos gloves.
The china plate too small for five steaks.
The BAR-B-Q toque and matching apron.
The gingham-check blouse.
The red knee-socks.
The lemon yellow dress and matching sweater.
The pumpkins.
The ornamental gourds.
The oversize bowl of fruit.
The chrysanthemums.
The shadows.
The man, the woman, the child.

Big Boy Barbecue Book, Tested Recipe Institute, Inc., 1956

Monday, September 17, 2012

Apple Soup




Once upon a time in America the only apples you could find, should you be looking, were gnarly, bitter, wormy crabs. When the first European settlers came over, they brought with them apple trees, but not being used to the new climate and soil, they did poorly. When you bring a brand new plant to an ecosystem you also need to think about how that plant will reproduce. The early settlers hadn’t considered a lack of honeybees for pollination when they packed their ships. So they brought honeybees and different apples and tried again until some survived, and again and again until more survived. Eventually, America had enough apple orchards to make cider for everyone to drink. No-one ate apples back then, as most apples were downright inedible. They made good cider though.

John Chapman, AKA “Johnny Appleseed” would collect apple pips from slush piles outside cider mills in Allegheny County, Pennsylvania in the autumn, and float them downriver to establish small orchards along the Ohio, which was then still the frontier. Once the settlers started moving west, and needed apple trees, his were mature enough to sell to them. Over time, the old world apple genes mixed with the native apple genes and produced hardier trees.

The original Golden Delicious tree in its protective cage.  (1931)
Thus did the Apple become American. Once in a blue moon the right combination of genes will produce an apple tree with delicious apples you can eat. This was the case with the original Golden Delicious tree, which grew in Clay County, West Virginia. Every Golden Delicious apple you have ever eaten comes from a clone of that tree.

The ABC of Jiffy Cookery, The Peter Pauper Press, 1961

Sunday, September 9, 2012

Breaking Eggs




Real chefs judge each other not by how well they can cook an elaborate dinner, but how well they can cook an omelet. This, the most simple of dishes, requires every real skill a good cook needs: confidence; the ability to cook an egg;  a light hand with seasoning; working with the right tools and heat; strong arm muscles to heft the pan while cooking, and to tip the omelet out at the end. If you’ve ever ballsed up something so simple, you’ll know how difficult it actually is.

Here’s the delicate flower of American cooking, Julia Child, showing us, in her inimitable way, how it’s done.


You can tell that the omelet is important because in her classic, Mastering The Art of French Cooking, she devotes many pages to breaking down each step, complete with illustrations. Note how the lady in this picture holds the pan. Now, go to your kitchen, and grab a pan just like it. That is, big and heavy. Hold it with one arm just like that.

Now, grab a plate.

Now, pretend you have a fragile omelet in there you have to quickly turn out, without breaking the omelet, the plate, the pan, or your arm.

Mastering The Art of French Cooking, Julia Child, Knopf, 1961

Also from this book: A Spot of (Batter) Bother

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

A Right Heap




For such a precise and comprehensive table of measures, here exists a great deal of imprecision: what is a “heaping” tablespoon? In 1903, when people had such things as dessertspoons that differed from tablespoons, and when coffeecups differed from teacups, these things made reliable sense. The gill has disappeared as a measurement from contemporary cookbooks, replaced by fractions of a cup.

How many drops in a gallon?

(3344)

Kentucky Receipt Book, Mary Harris Frazer, 1903

Sunday, July 29, 2012

Vacay



Yuckylicious is on holiday for two weeks.

For the English, this means huddling on a beach in bathing suits and coats, trying to ignore the hail, taking a very quick dip in the frigid sea, and finally tucking in to some fish and chips as the sun sets imperceptibly behind a thick bank of cloud.

(Thanks to surfnslide for pic of Rhossili Bay, where the author of this blog spent many a fine summer shivering on the sand. Picture taken pretty much from the fish and chip shop, I'd guess.)

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Faggots




Faggots have long been a staple of English cuisine. As a very down to earth dish, made from the remnants of butchery, it is perhaps understandable that here they are made to sound more fancy by calling them “Belgian,” though there is nothing in the recipe to suggest that there is anything foreign about them.

Calling any food item a “faggot” now would probably seem to many to be particular unsavory, given the more contemporary and derogatory use of the word to describe homosexuals. Neither of these two terms have any connection to the other faggot — that of a bundle of sticks, which has been a term in use since the 13th century.

 A Plain Cookery Book for the Working Classes, Charles Elmé Francatelli, The Scolar Press, 1852


Monday, July 23, 2012

Complimentary


click to enlarge


If cooks know that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, then cookbook writers know that the way to a woman’s heart is through her ego.

This heading is designed less to appeal to the technician who wants to cook things merely competently, but to the prideful woman whose pursuits in the kitchen are designed for personal glory. Aunt Jenny knows a thing or two when it comes to the psychology of the housewife who has perhaps lost other means of winning praise because her husband has become complacent about offering it, or because she’s become complacent about earning it in other ways. If the woman in question is not in the workplace, she needs to be queen of her domain, with a suited man ready and willing to tell the world how great her french fries are.

Enjoy Good Eating Every Day The Easy Spry Way, Lever Brothers Company, 1940

Also from this book: Spry

Friday, July 20, 2012

Sloe Gin




With a maturation time of seven years, it ought to be called “slow gin,” which is often what people think the word is. The sloe berry is a lovely blue which when touched turns to black, and was once very prevalent among British hedgerows, along with rosehips and blackberries. Rosehips, full of vitamin C, aren’t good to eat, but make a lovely sweet cordial.


 The sugar is necessary to extract the essence from the berries in the alcohol, which turns a deep red color.

Here is Joe Bonamassa singing his song “Sloe Gin.” It was originally written and performed by Tim Curry. 


The Alice B. Toklas Cook Book, Alice B. Toklas, 1954

Also from this book: One Toke Over The Line

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Clean The Refrigerator Stew




The name of a dish ought to do at least two things: it should indicate what kind of dish it is, perhaps listing a main ingredient for identification purposes, and it should sound appetizing.

Rose Elder might have stopped at “Vegetable Stew,” although that would have been misleading, given the two pounds of beef in it. She certainly needn’t have indicated that this recipe is a catch-all for getting rid of items she no longer wants, or pointed to a housekeeping task that possibly reminds one of the nasty stuff left in the bottom of refrigerator bins that prompts you to clean them in the first place.

The Golfer’s Cookbook, Rose Elder, 1977

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