Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Sea Cucumber

Shark: Oi! You!

Whale: Wassup!

Shark: What in Neptune’s Depths are you?

Whale: I am a zucchini.

Shark: What species is that?

Whale: Curcubita Pepo.

Shark: Never heard of it. What are you related to?

Whale: Well, all squashes, really — cucumbers, marrows, acorn squash, spaghetti squash, that sort of thing.

Shark: You’re not a Sea Cucumber, then?

Whale: Oh, no — they’re animals, not plants. Completely different Kingdom altogether. You look a bit odd yourself. What are you?

Shark: A pickle. Cucumis Sativus to be precise.

Whale: Then we’re cousins!

Shark: What?

Whale: Sure: we’re both part of the Cucurbitoideae family.

Shark: No way!

Whale: You better believe it. You’re a gourd. You look a bit like a gourd. Except with fins.

Shark: What happened to your fins? How do you swim?

Whale: With great difficulty. Someone forgot to make me any.

Shark: Tough rap, Cuz.

Whale: Tell me about it. Hey — nice running in to you. Maybe I’ll catch you again sometime.

Shark: If no-one catches you first!

How To Garnish, International Culinary Consultants, 1983

Also from this book: Salad Worms And Melon Whales
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