Monday, July 25, 2011

For Men Only

 So let’s get this straight: first of all this cookbook has the temerity to suggest that men exercise their occasional desire to “take his turn in the kitchen” so infrequently as to require “failure-proof” recipes that can be prepared “with minimum of time spent in the kitchen.”

Then, the recipe they provide “For Men Only” — Roasted Coconut Chips — demands the use of tools such as an ice pick, hammer, and rasp. This is just the sort of cooking project the man they envision loves: a hard object that needs to be penetrated to extract the guts so that it (the “meat”) can be subjected to fire.

Ladies: we all know what happens, don’t we? Shards of coconut shell will be sprayed in all directions; a butter knife will meet its end attempting to scrape out the stubborn coconut flesh, and once he’s put it in the oven (lit by you) and poured himself a congratulatory martini — and drunk it — and watched a bit of the game — and darling, can you smell something burning?

As a side note, check out the ass on Pepé Le Pew there, with his chef’s toque.

American Oriental Foods, Book Production Industries, Inc., 1961

Also from this book: Murder on the Orient Express
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