Tuesday, January 31, 2012

The Seven Year Itch

Juanita: Happy Anniversary!

Lupé: Obrigado!

Juanita: So, what are you planning — anything special?

Lupé: Well, Carlos is taking me out to dinner — something fancy, I think.

Juanita: You should wear that gorgeous black dress.

Lupé: You can count on it. I need all the help I can get these days!

Juanita: What!? Has the bloom worn off so soon?

Lupé: All he wants to do is stay up “working” until I’m asleep. And then… nothing.

Juanita: Oh!

Lupé: It’s the internet porn. Juanita, I can’t compete!

Juanita: Maybe it’s time for drastic measures.

Lupé: What do you mean?

Juanita: Down below.

Lupé: Quê?

Juanita: Some landscaping.

Lupé: Quê?

Juanita: Turn the jungle into a desert.

Lupé: Quê?

Juanita: Raspar todo…

Lupé: A área do biquíni?

Juanita: Sim!

Lupé: A coisa toda?

Juanita: Yes. Trust me. No-one wants shredded coconut between their teeth.

Woman’s Day, December 1969

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